thought I forgot

to say
thought i would forget
the lessons of the day
when its time to go to bed
and begin to drift away.

could it be
that my sleeping patterns keep me from achieving greater potential?

currently i feel as if i am going through a tunnel...
the tunnel is an infinite field of POTENTIAL
the tunnel is directly linked to my past future and present


i feel the reason my life goes in waves of highs and lows
might be because i am stuck in a tunnel, i keep traveling back and forth
to the past and present, the future remains unknown

i think the anxiety and detatchment ive felt is the realization of time
and my own judgement of what ive done with it and what i could do
thought i would always walk hand in hand
i really did think i was special
i just didnt know how

im back on the loop

May Showers

last night was the worst
i am home now...almost 8am and no desire to do it all over again tonight.

i feel a little dissapointed with the way things are right now
and i ask myself what would make things better
what would make me feel like i am climbing up
rather than running on a treadmill...

theres no point A to B
but maybe life is not that simple.

either way i know i have the power
as corny as it sounds
its true.

i think back on the choices ive made
i am mostly proud of them
the experiences ive had are priceless
to me...

but i should swallow my pride
the reality of my situation is
i am back where i started

this climb is not up a hill
its a rocky mountain
and not all reach the top

ive been swept by a current
of social consciousness
and ive doubted myself

i dont want to forget the dream
i miss LA and all its excitement
i miss the wisdom of Mt. Rainier
but most of all i miss the me
that believed everything was possible

star signs
and pyramid power
third eye
and focused mind
fortune tellers
and messages from beyond

they cant help me now...